Friday, 16 January 2015

Telstra/Big Pond at its "very best"

Readers, before proceeding to read  what follows ensure a stiff drink is readily available. If coffee is the preferred beverage, ensure its super duper strength.

At the table of knowledge at the local watering hole this afternoon Jacko, one of the regulars, delivered the report that follows.

During the report some of Jacko's mates had to be given assistance to get up off the tiles at the watering hole. A visiting medico who was on site said they were in a state of shock and recommended a couple of the lads should, as a matter of urgency, obtain counselling to assist them in their recovery.

"As a long term Telstra/Bigpond customer (30 years+) in the Clarence valley I had no/nil/zilch ADSL service from the provider this week and, on occasions, no telephone access. When T/BP finally restored the services I contacted the telco's billing department with the view to having my bill adjusted to reflect my week's "experience".

A T/BP consultant, obviously one with a first class honors degree in pure AND applied mathematics, used a magnifying glass and, it would seem a multitude of other devices, to examine my account and concluded I had been "inconvenienced" by four, maybe five days. Consequently, I was told my account would be credited on a pro rata basis for four days.

"Hold on", I said, "things out here in the real wide world are not based on such thinking."

The T/BP consultant, obviously a quick thinker, said, "OK, I see where you're coming from. We'll give you seven days' credit."


"What do you mean?" was the consultant's response.

After an extensive period of explaining logic 101 to the consultant an auction-like procedure was adopted.

Finally, the consultant said I should be compensated for T/BP's stuff-up and given a 50% discount on my monthly T/BP bill.

You'd swear Telstra's bottom line was going to drop so much its share price was destined to go down the gurgler on the basis of this single event!

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