The joys of marriage - just jokin'!

Source: The Voice, CPSA, March 2012

A little NSW North Coast National Party history

It seems that the former Member for Clarence Steve Cansdell is not the only NSW North Coast National Party MP who fell afoul of the rules and lost his seat.

Here is mention of the former NSW Minister for Administrative Services and former member for Coffs Harbour, Matt Singleton, who was previously the Member for Clarence from February 1971 to August 1981.

That makes two out of the last four Nationals MPs representing Clarence coming to a sticky political end.

Hansard NSW Legislative Assembly 8 April 1998:  

Mr CARR: …… But I have done the National Party a great disservice, because the coalition had barely been elected to government and ICAC had not even begun its work on the north coast land deals when Matt Singleton was sacked overnight by Greiner. Matt Singleton had a great deal going. He was busily promoting to his Minister the rezoning of a nice little territory in his electorate. But he forgot to declare that he owned the property - a pretty big thing to overlook…

Hansard NSW Legislative Assembly 24 June 1992:  

Dr REFSHAUGE: …… The most grave of these omissions was that of the former Minister, Matt Singleton, whose failure to declare shareholdings in finance and property development companies was brought to light. The Deputy Premier also had failed to declare shareholdings in Matt Singleton's company, STR Finance. Mr Singleton not only failed to include shareholdings in a declaration to the Parliament; he completely ignored the former Premier's demand for a separate pecuniary interest file exclusive to him. Mr Singleton's indiscretion did not end there. He was found to be lobbying a ministerial colleague to have land rezoned for development. If the rezoning had occurred, Mr Singleton would have benefited substantially. It took Opposition pressure to have this disgraced Minister forced from office. This is the cleanskin Government. Matt Singleton, within a year of the Government coming to office, was forced to resign because he lacked the probity and the propriety to perform his ministerial responsibilities appropriately.

Antarctic: When is the Government of Japan going to get its priorities straight?

Photograph from Hervey Bay Tourist Centre

When is the Government of Japan going to get its priorities straight?  Hopefully before 2013. Its state-sponsored whale killers must be must be near a financial bottom of the ocean by now.

News.com.au March 9, 2012:

JAPAN has ended this season's whale hunt in the Antarctic Ocean having caught less than a third of its original target, the Fisheries Agency says.

Japanese whalers killed 266 minke whales and one fin whale, the agency said, well below the roughly 900 they had been aiming for when they left Japan in December.

The West Australian March 9, 2012:

The Japanese whaling fleet has pulled out of the Southern Ocean and is heading home three weeks before the whale hunt was scheduled to end.
The Japanese consul in Perth and the Institute of Cetacean Research have both confirmed the whalers are heading back to Japan.

You know you're an Aussie when..............

Currently doing the rounds on the Internet.

YOU KNOW YOU’RE AUSTRALIAN WHEN

You believe that stubbies can either be drunk or worn. You've made a bong out of your garden hose rather than use it for something legal such as watering the garden. You understand that the phrase 'a group of women wearing black thongs' refers to footwear and may be less alluring than it sounds. You pronounce Melbourne as 'Mel-bin'. You believe the 'l' in the word 'Australia' is optional. You can translate: 'Dazza and Shazza played Acca Dacca on the way to Maccas'.

You call your best friend 'a total bastard' but someone you really, truly despise is just 'a bit of a bastard'. You think 'Woolloomooloo' is a perfectly reasonable name for a place. You're secretly proud of our killer wildlife. You believe it makes sense for a country to have a $1 coin that's twice as big as its $2 coin. You understand that 'Wagga Wagga' can be abbreviated to 'Wagga' but 'Woy Woy' can't be called 'Woy'.

You believe that cooked down axle grease makes a good breakfast spread - you've squeezed it through Vita Weats to make little Vegemite worms. You believe all famous Kiwis are actually Australian, until they stuff up, at which point they again become Kiwis. Beetroot with your Hamburger... of course! You know that certain words must, by law, be shouted out during any rendition of the Angels' song 'Am I Ever Gonna See Your Face Again' And 'Living next door to Alice'. You wear ugg boots outside the house. You believe that every important discovery in the world was made by an Australian but then sold off for a pittance.

You believe that the more you shorten someone's name the more you like them. Whatever your linguistic skills, you find yourself able to order takeaway fluently in every Asian language. You understand that 'excuse me' can sound rude, While 'scuse me' is always polite. You know what it's like to swallow a fly, on occasion via your nose. You know it's not summer until the steering wheel is too hot to handle and a seat belt buckle becomes a pretty good branding iron. Your biggest family argument over the summer concerned the rules for beach cricket. You shake your head in horror when companies try to market what they call 'Anzac Cookies'.

You still think of Kylie as 'that girl off Neighbours'. When working in a bar, you understand male customers will feel the need to offer an excuse whenever they order low-alcohol beer. You know how to abbreviate every word, all of which usually end in "o": arvo, combo, garbo, kero, lezzo, metho, milko, muso, rego, servo, smoko, speedo, righto, goodo etc... You know that there is a universal place called 'woop woop' located in the middle of nowhere, no matter where you actually are! You know that none of us actually drink Fosters beer, because it tastes like piss.

You sleep with Aeroguard on in the summer and don't mind it as a perfume. You've only ever used the words - tops, ripper, sick, mad, sweet, to mean "good" and when you place 'bloody' in front of it then you really mean it. You know that the barbecue is a political arena. You say 'no worries' quite often, whether you realise it or not. You understand what no wucking furries means. You've drank your tea/coffee/milo through a Tim Tam. You own a Bond's chesty - in several different colours.

You know that some people pronounce Australia like "Straya" and that's ok. And you will immediately forward this list to other Australians, here and overseas, realising that only they will understand!