The member for the Planet of the Apes interjects....

I opened the Clarence Valley Review the other day to find one of those dob-in-a-terrorist-or-the-neighbour-you-don't-like adverts taking up a good half of page 17 in the last issue.
This money wasting exercise featured a tag cloud in the shape of Australia which highlighted such gems as I know this person who has downloaded a lot of documents from suspicious websites and I can't shake the feeling something's wrong.
Well, I thought, what a yawn - the internet filters installed on Federal Parliament PCs seem to feel that half the political blogs written by Australians are suspicious and the President of the Senate and the Black Rod appear to think that all internet activity by elected senators is inherently dangerous.
But then I read the adverts' main blurb; So if you see or hear something that just doesn't feel right, please call the National Security Hotline and keep the information flowing.
Now there's a thought! It's hard not to see and hear things that aren't quite right in Canberra these days, so perhaps I should let my fingers do the walking and inform on...........
Luke Hartsuyker, Nationals MP for Cowper, for this inane remark demonstrating a waste of space; The member for the Planet of the Apes interjects.[House of Reps 29 May 2008]
Tony Abbott, Liberal MP for Warringah, for these bon mots; Madam Deputy Speaker, I rise on a point of order. The member for Shortland is wasting our time raving on about people going surfing. If she has a question to ask the minister, she should ask it. and Mr Deputy Speaker, I am not making any personal aspersions against the member for Maribyrnong. [House of Reps 5 June] and Mr Speaker, I said that she was a liar and I withdraw that. [26 March 2007]
Wilson Tuckey, Liberal MP for O'Connor, for insulting peanuts; Mr Speaker, I rise on a point of order. I want to refer you to standing orders 88, 89, 90 and 91 relating to disorderly conduct. If you want disorderly conduct in this place, let that peanut carry on with matters that have nothing to do with the question. [House of Reps 18 June]
Malcolm Turnbull, Liberal MP for Wentworth, for the crime of over-explanation; Mr Speaker, I wish to make a personal explanation. [House of Reps 19 June] and Mr Speaker, I wish to make a personal explanation [19 June] and again Mr Speaker, I wish to make a personal explanation [17 March] and yet again Mr Speaker, I wish to make a personal explanation. [12 March]
Julie Bishop, Liberal MP for Curtin, for copying Malcolm Turnbull's homework: Mr Speaker, I wish to make a personal explanation [House of Reps 19 June] and Mr Speaker, I wish to make a personal explanation. [18 June]
Brendan Nelson, Liberal MP for Bradfield, for his daffy ways and disrespectfully using the term "silly idiot"; Mr Speaker, just to assist you: if I have said anything at all which is in any way offensive to the Deputy Prime Minister, I withdraw. [House of Reps 18 June]

* A big thankyou to the four blokes and a sheila at OpenAustralia who have just made hunting political snipe that much easier! And quite seriously, have made Hansard searches a little less daunting when looking for your local member's contribution to debate.