Questions floating out in cyberspace

Ever noticed just how many questions are posed on the Internet?

Here are some of those queries offered up into cyberspace by others and my thoughtless answers:

Q. How are the Eyjafjallajökull eruption emissions counted?
A. By the number of vowels in the volcano's name ;-D

Q. Is there anything Conroy’s said in defence of his Great Wall of Australia that hasn’t been misleading, disingenuous or flat-out lying?
A. NO and NO and NO.

Q. Who is the Devil?

A. That bloke on the left of the dispatch box during Question Time.

Q. What did I do today?

A. Removed those hairs that have migrated from the top of my noggin down to my ears {from the way-too-much-info file}

Q. How do planes stay in the air?

A. Interaction between lift, weight, thrust and drag on the back of five Hail Marys.

Q. Why do people blog?

A. There is no one answer - might as well count pebbles on the beach.

Q. Does God exist?

A. Only if you're afraid of the dark or in the middle of a firefight.

Q. Who's to blame for {fill in the blank}?

A. God or Goldman Sachs - take your pick.

Q. Do we have the right to kill people?

A. Put yourself in front of the executioner/soldier/armed assailant and then ask yourself that question again.

Q. Why do Australians, unlike our western democratic brothers and sisters need the government to tell us what we can access on the internet with no choice in the matter and no details of what is/will be blocked?

A. Well actually we don't, but Rudders right-wing wowsers intend to shaft us anyway.

Q. Why do people hunt innocent animals?

A. Mostly because hunting each other is illegal.

Q. Where do snowflakes come from?

A. They're pieces of cloud shaken loose when angels do the Lindy Hop.

Q. Why do bankers make so much money?

A. Because they usually have governments of the day by the short and curlies and no pollie is game to stop them feeding at the trough.

Q. Vote for change, Nick?

A. Nah - that chap Snowden's too busy trying to avoid expulsion from uni over his homophobic, racist and misogynistic slurs on Twitter.

Q. Why can't humans breathe under water?

A. For the same reason they can't walk on top of it.

Q. Is anyone else suspicious that the press conference is at dinner time?

A. Er, no. If the fourth estate is on duty it's on duty - no time off for an extended nosh on the boss's dollar.

Fight! Fight!

Stupid Fight has turned up on my digital radar:
What's this all about?
FACT: A lot of people on Twitter are stupid. Many of these people follow celebrities and try to send them messages. But which celebrity's fans are most stupid? It's time to find out.

As can be seen, this software places followers of right-wing journo Andrew Bolt and Australian Opposition Leader Tony Abbott in the thick as short planks category. Well - surprise, surprise.

Internet activism against mandatory filtering according to Ben Grubb

Not a bad idea for a young bloke:

"Today the costs of running a blacklist were made clear, showing that the filter could be a very expensive operation.
When a URL is submitted to the Australian Communications and Media Authority (ACMA) it will cost between $173 and $685 per item to investigate, regardless of whether it is "refused classification" or not.
The dollar value was revealed in answer to Greens communications spokesperson Scott Ludlam who had asked ACMA how much it cost to action URLs submitted for the Classification Board to classify.
"In 2008-09, the average cost to ACMA of investigating an item of online content that was not referred to the Classification Board was approximately $173 per item. For items that were referred to the Classification Board this was $685 per item, which included the cost of the ACMA preparing and administering the referrals," ACMA said.
If I wanted to stymie the filter, I'd just keep bombarding ACMA's online complaint form with questionable URLs. If lots of people did this — and we know there are lots of people who feel strongly about the filter — it would only be a matter of time before the costs blew out to completely unmanageable levels." {Ben Grubb, ZDNet.com.au}

Twitter gets all historical

According to the U.K. Telegraph on Saturday last Twitter is being turned into one giant global 'dear diary' in the interests of a social history of our times:
"In an extraordinary agreement with Twitter's founders, the Library of Congress – the world's largest library and America's oldest federal institution – is to create a digital archive of the several billion tweets publicly posted on the social networking site since its inception in 2006.

No longer, it seems, will messages such as "I'm on the train" and "Queuing for doughnuts" necessarily be considered meaningless.The library, whose mission is to "further human understanding and wisdom", sees Twitter as a rich source for anthropological research that will give future generations insight into how we lived and the issues important to us, just as letters, journals and photographs have for previous centuries."

The STilg's punny verballing will live 4 eva and no_filter_Yamba needs to polish its face for posterity!

Kevin Hogan where are you?

In December 2009 the Nats selected Kevin Hogan to run against Labor's Janelle Saffin in the Page electorate on the NSW North Coast.
Since then locals have caught sight of Kevin as he tried to get people to sign Hartsuyker's ill-fated bat petition earlier in the year, a bit later when he went head-to-head with Saffin in a Lismore health debate and then when he popped up to verbally kiss a certain Liberal lycra clad rear end. But we haven't seen hide nor hair of him lately even though he is supposedly travelling around the electorate listening to "concerns".
Is he trying to keep a low profile until the federal election writs are issued or has he absolutely nothing to say that the media has found interesting enough to print?
At this rate I'll turn up to cast my vote knowing nothing about the man except he's rather flat, was formerly a market trader, then it seems a talking head on the tellie and is now some sort of self-employed financial consultant and cow cockie.
If he doesn't speak up soon I might mistake the bloke for that other Kevin Hogan who was recently nabbed trying to pass counterfeit readies in Georgia.
So where the bl**dy hell are you, Kev?

Fess up - you grinned when you heard that Goldman Sachs was charged with fraud, didn't you?

"WALL STREET POWERHOUSE ACCUSED OF FRAUD: The government says Goldman Sachs & Co. sold mortgage investments without telling the buyers that the securities were crafted with input from a client who was betting on them to fail. Goldman denies the civil fraud allegations."
{Google News}

The Commission brings this securities fraud action against Goldman, Sachs & Co. ("GS&Co") and a GS&Co employee, Fabrice Tourre ("Tourre"), for making materially misleading statements and omissions in connection with a synthetic collateralized debt obligation ("CDO") GS&Co structured and marketed to investors. This synthetic CDO, ABACUS 2007AC1, was tied to the performance of subprime residential mortgage-backed securities ("RMBS") and was structured and marketed by GS&Co in early 2007 when the United States housing market and related securities were beginning to show signs of distress. {SEC versus Goldman Sachs & Co. and Another}

I know I had a grin from ear to ear when I heard that the financial anaconda had finally been caught out and I think I'm not alone in that. I'm not sure who demanded trial by jury but I'm willing to bet that there will be few in any American juror pool who will be unaffected by the sub-prime debacle and it aftermath.

"Ever since the financial catastrophe of 2007-08, Goldman Sachs has been hyper-vigilant when it comes to the media. Many like myself have been complained about and rudely denied access. The blogosphere has been patrolled 24/7 so that critics can be promptly pounced on.
Now we know why.
Yesterday's bombshell announcement that Goldman was charged with fraud by the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission is hardly surprising. This is Wall Street's last survivor, and it is about to be ordered off the island too, so to speak." {My confidence in the SEC is restored}

Tweets on the subject:
timbray: Any morning where Goldman Sachs is getting prosecuted by the Feds is a good morning. Pity it's civil not criminal.

theexpert: Please ... PLEASE, prove to me that Twitter has some relevance. Make Goldman Sachs a trending topic.

bobhayward: RT @Lucas_Wyrsch: In Goldman Sachs We Do Not Trust http://dlvr.it/XFbl http://myloc.me/65XdS

KeithSwiderski How can the government sue Goldman Sachs? I thought Goldman Sachs ran the government?

In which era do Australian judges dwell?

Every so often a news report comes along which just confirms my suspicion that Australian judges live in another time and place from the rest of us mere mortals.
The Northern Territory News came up with this last Thursday:
"CHIEF Minister Paul Henderson said yesterday he did not believe a 13-year-old girl could consent to having sex with her teacher.
He made the comments after a Supreme Court judge said a teacher was not a rapist "as that word is ordinarily understood" because there was no evidence the sex he had with his student was not consensual.....
Justice Mildren said the teacher was not a "sexual predator" - but had suffered from a "life of loneliness".
WTF? Sexual abuse of a child is A O.K. if the person with all the power has a lousy life?
Justice Dean Mildren, gawd help us all, lectures to aspiring lawyers at the Northern Territory University besides supplying ready-made justifications to human predators.
Mildren is a serial offender when it comes to offering excuses for those caught abusing children.
This is de judge in 2008:
"Justice Dean seems to think that because teacher Paul Incani was "in love" with his sixteen year-old student {fifteen at time of the offence}, and the student was a "willing" partner in the relationship, that Mr Incani has been poorly treated and deserves to be freed from jail forthwith."