Ever noticed just how many questions are posed on the Internet?
Here are some of those queries offered up into cyberspace by others and my thoughtless answers:
Q. How are the Eyjafjallajökull eruption emissions counted?
A. By the number of vowels in the volcano's name ;-D
Q. Is there anything Conroy’s said in defence of his Great Wall of Australia that hasn’t been misleading, disingenuous or flat-out lying?
A. NO and NO and NO.
A. By the number of vowels in the volcano's name ;-D
Q. Is there anything Conroy’s said in defence of his Great Wall of Australia that hasn’t been misleading, disingenuous or flat-out lying?
A. NO and NO and NO.
Q. Who is the Devil?
A. That bloke on the left of the dispatch box during Question Time.
Q. What did I do today?
A. Removed those hairs that have migrated from the top of my noggin down to my ears {from the way-too-much-info file}
Q. How do planes stay in the air?
A. Interaction between lift, weight, thrust and drag on the back of five Hail Marys.
Q. Why do people blog?
A. There is no one answer - might as well count pebbles on the beach.
Q. Does God exist?
A. Only if you're afraid of the dark or in the middle of a firefight.
Q. Who's to blame for {fill in the blank}?
A. God or Goldman Sachs - take your pick.
Q. Do we have the right to kill people?
A. Put yourself in front of the executioner/soldier/armed assailant and then ask yourself that question again.
Q. Why do Australians, unlike our western democratic brothers and sisters need the government to tell us what we can access on the internet with no choice in the matter and no details of what is/will be blocked?
A. Well actually we don't, but Rudders right-wing wowsers intend to shaft us anyway.
Q. Why do people hunt innocent animals?
A. Mostly because hunting each other is illegal.
Q. Where do snowflakes come from?
A. They're pieces of cloud shaken loose when angels do the Lindy Hop.
Q. Why do bankers make so much money?
A. Because they usually have governments of the day by the short and curlies and no pollie is game to stop them feeding at the trough.
Q. Vote for change, Nick?
A. Nah - that chap Snowden's too busy trying to avoid expulsion from uni over his homophobic, racist and misogynistic slurs on Twitter.
Q. Why can't humans breathe under water?
A. For the same reason they can't walk on top of it.
Q. Is anyone else suspicious that the press conference is at dinner time?
A. Er, no. If the fourth estate is on duty it's on duty - no time off for an extended nosh on the boss's dollar.
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