Of bats and B52s

Bats are still a favoured topic in letters to the editor found in the Old Egg Timer of Grafton on the NSW North Coast.

Clarence Plague

A NEW disease has been discovered in the Clarence Valley, which is believed to be associated with bats.

It is thought to be a virus, and rednecks, halfwits, and National Party politicians are especially vulnerable to the virus.

It is particularly virulent in the Cowper Electorate.

Symptoms include ranting, raving, frothing at the mouth, chest beating, and a type of flatulence that results in copious amounts of hot air issuing from the mouth.

Other symptoms include a morbid desire to seek media attention, and those afflicted will be seen standing near high schools, hospitals or roads trying to get their pictures taken.

Another manifestation of the condition is the writing of irrational letters to the local papers advocating all sorts of strange anti social behaviour, including discharge of fireworks in public places.

Those afflicted who are also gun nuts, become obsessed with the idea of putting on their camouflage fatigues and roaming around discharging firearms.

Medical authorities think that the condition is incurable and the most humane option would be to euthanase the sufferers.

Bio-ethicists are concerned that this might be construed as a form of eugenics which is against the Geneva Convention and The Hague Protocols.

Of more concern is the worry that if the local authorities don't get the outbreak under control soon, it will attract the attention of the Centre for Disease Control in Atlanta, and the Americans will fly a B52 over and drop a 10-megaton warhead on the Cowper Electorate, to stop the spread of the contagion.

The bats say however, that they are the victims of a vicious smear campaign and the virus got into Australia via racehorses from Abu Dhabi, or banana imports from Ecuador.

M. CASEY

Grafton

Some background here from our local political wonderkind in clogs - Hartsuyker’s strengthens Maclean bats Bill to end bureaucratic buck passing and remove Federal Minister from the process

North Coast fishermen and cane farmers oppose any Clarence River water diversion

Excerpt from The Land article Clarence River can’t ‘spare a drop’ on 19 November 2010:

While North Coast primary producers have a lot more sympathy for the plight of inland irrigators than they do for the Queenslanders in population overdrive, they say that despite the image most people have of the massive Clarence the reality is the river cannot spare a drop.

The fresh water flushes during floods are the lifeblood of the region’s fishing industry, the biggest supplier of seafood in NSW, sustaining 140 wild harvest commercial fishermen.

Professional Fishermen’s Association executive officer, John Harrison, Maclean, said the fresh water flows brought nutrients and the opportunity for fish growth and there was “no room for a single drop” to be taken from the system without a detrimental impact on the fishing industry and environment.

Beef producer, Elizabeth Fahey, who has double frontage to the Clarence on her Brahman breeding property at Copmanhurst, said there were times during dry spells when she could walk across parts of the river without getting her feet wet.

“The practicalities are that the expense of setting up the infrastructure required to allow inland producers to utilise water in times of high flow would not make the scheme viable, when the access to water would not be all the time,” she said.

While sugar producers in the Clarence don’t irrigate, NSW Canegrowers chairman, Vince Castle, said the region could not do without its fishing industry and the overwhelming feeling among cane growers was “utter opposition” to the concept.

True words tweeted in jest?

BernardKeane

Australian politics: the asinine versus the inept, reported by the facile. I swear to dog it's enough to make you move to NZ.

via TweetDeck

Free EarthScan webcast "Reconnecting Nature and Culture", Wednesday, November 24, 2010 4:00 am Sydney AEDT

A hatip to Margi Prideaux over at Wild Politics for alerting the blogosphere to this event:

Earthcasts are monthly free one-hour interactive web events from Earthscan

In November the subject is:

Reconnecting Nature and Culture

>> Understand the concept of biocultural diversity
>> Learn how to integrate cultural and spiritual values into conservation, tourism and heritage management practices
>> Discover how embracing the values of local people can dramatically increase the success of conservation and sustainability efforts, for the benefit of all

Tuesday 23rd November 2010
17:00 (UK time – GMT), 12:00 (EDT), 9:00 (PDT)

Click here to register

There must be something in that there Canberra water!

There must definitely be something extra in the water down Canberra way……..
This week we were all treated to the decidedly unholy sight of Tony Mad Monk Abbott scurrying into the back pews of the House of Reps clad in singlet and shorts sans shoes, because after all as Leader of the Opposition a personal exercise regime is more important than anything else.

The shadow Treasurer Joe Hockey was heard monumentally wasting the House’s time on a housekeeping measure; “Mr Speaker, I am reluctant to raise this, but I have raised this matter previously with Parliament House departmental officials. Early in the morning on sitting days there is a tendency for lawnmowers and air blowers to be used outside offices during radio interviews. On one occasion I actually had to stop the interview—I know it is hard to believe, Mr Speaker—until the noise had passed. Given that there is a considerable amount of time when parliament is not sitting and that we do not sit on Fridays, I again request that we do not have the extraordinary noise from lawnmowers and various other machinery being used outside our office windows between 7 am and 9 am.”

And later in the week telling another member; “Just keep your hands well displayed there, Bill! Keep them up; keep them above the table! We do not know what you have in your holster, old son; we can only guess! He is the one who has to go through the metal detector on the way into parliament! You have to be careful of the smiley ones! I am having a great time paying out on this guy..”
Does everyone in the Opposition think that the Xmas silly season began early this year?
All that was needed was to spot Bronnie in an Ascot hat to confirm the lack of political direction.

Pic taken from ABC The Insiders on 21st November 2010.

Quotes from Hansard

One in the eye for Windsor and Xenophon

From A Clarence Valley Protest on 19 November 2010:

Clarence Valley Council responds to Windsor, Xenophon and the rest of those would be water raiders

From the Minutes of Ordinary Monthly Meeting of Clarence Valley Council on 16 November 2010:

COUNCIL RESOLUTION – 10.017/10
(Cr Williamson)
That:
1. The Council again register it strong opposition to any plans to divert waters out of the Clarence catchment.
2. Council makes a submission to the House of Representatives Standing Committee on Regional Australia inquiry into the proposed Murray-Darling Basin Plan (MDBP), noting Council’s opposition to any plans to divert waters out of the Clarence catchment.
Voting recorded as follows:
For: Councillors Williamson, Comben, Dinham, Howe, Hughes, McKenna, Simmons, Tiley and Toms.
Against: Nil

Gillard Government to remove cap on redundancy payments says Saffin

Media release from Member for Page Janelle Saffin on 19 November 2010:

Page MP Janelle Saffin has welcomed new redundancy provisions that mean from next year workers will receive redundancy pay for every year of service if their company goes broke.

From January 1, 2011, the Gillard Government will remove the cap on redundancy payments so that workers’ payouts will be based on how many years they have served.

Ms Saffin said at present, if an employer becomes insolvent and cannot fund redundancy entitlements, the redundancy pay is capped at 16 weeks.

“This means that an employee who has been with a company for 35 years can receive the same as someone who had worked there for only five years.

“It is a big blow to any employee if the company they work for goes broke and they lose their job, but it is even tougher for those who don’t get their full entitlements

“However, under the Government changes, from next year workers will receive a payout of up to four weeks pay for every year of service.

“This is a fairer system, and ensures employees are paid what they deserve if their employer goes into liquidation,” Ms Saffin said.

“The global financial crisis led to an increased need for redundancy payments and the Government is committed to funding entitlements.”

The changes will be made by amending GEERS (General Employee Entitlements and Redundancy Scheme) Operational Arrangements.

Clarence water diversion? He said, she said.

A classic He said She said from The Daily Examiner on 19 November 2010.

Craig William Isherwood said:

A RIGHT wing Victorian-based independent political party wants to build six dams and a hydro-electric power station to divert Clarence River floodwaters.
The Citizens Electoral Council of Australia wants the Murray Darling Basin authority to consider the diversion, which it says is costed out at $230 million.
The party claims diverting the Clarence floodwaters could be the best solution to revive the nation’s “food bowl” rather than the proposed irrigation allocation cuts....
Citizens Electoral Council leader Craig Isherwood said the scheme, if implemented, would harvest 1000 gigalitres annually of floodwater and would not be detrimental to the river’s health, but would mitigate floods.

Jan Marsh said:

I say:

Read these Citizens Electoral Council official party flyers on the Murray Darling Basin Plan and the Clarence River - then try not to weep with laughter.

According to Maud Up The Street every time Tony tells a pork pie.......

.....another hair follicle dies.