Following a conversation with former PM, John Howard, NCV is able to reveal startling "relevations" (sic) [yep! that exactly how JWH put it] about where he will be on Christmas Day.
NCV can confirm that JWH WILL NOT be spending Christmas with the Doug Anthony All Stars.
Avid JWH fans ... watch this space.
Showing posts with label howard trivia. Show all posts
Showing posts with label howard trivia. Show all posts
Saturday 1 December 2007
Former PM admits he's been getting his dates mixed up
Exclusive
North Coast Voices has had the luxury of a private viewing of former PM John Howard's diary entries.
JWH said his diary will be heavily used when he appears on the public speaking scene in town and country halls across the country in the New Year. However JWH confided to NCV that he hasn't had any luck in securing the services of an agent who would be prepared to take him under its wing and organise what he is very confident would be a block busting success.
Should he fail to appear on the public speaking scene by Easter, JWH said he would opt for the far more lucrative option of going straight to the big screen and produce and direct a movie about himself.
JWH said he figured a public speaking tour was the very least he should do in order to repay his followers across the breadth of this great nation. In an aside, JWH remarked that he thought the many public appearances he could make would provide him with ideal opportunities to use the blanket appeal strategy and collect any loose coins and folding money his mates had left. "My finances are not what some people say they are. Living off a mere $300,000 pa will be no easy matter. My good wife and I have become accustomed to a life style that we won't be able to throw away lightly. Why else do you reckon I hung in there tooth and nail?"
When asked how 2007 had unfolded for him, JWH exclaimed, "Drats! I thought, sure as eggs, that 2007 was the Chinese Year of the Rat. In fact, I was so sure of myself I would have put good money on it. Not that I'm a gambling man. No sirreee! I'm a Sunday School goer. Mind you, it wouldn't have been my money anyway because, as you all know, I've had my hand in the public purse for so long that I don't even have a wallet I call my own. After all, why would I need one?"
"I've been the nation's prime rodent for over 11 years. Just quietly, some of my best mates reckon I'm the best lying rodent this nation has ever had. And who am I to argue with them?"
When told 2008 was the Year of the Pig, JWH said that made things a whole lot better for him.
"Phew, that's a big help. I'll be able to use that in my speeches. That'll get me off the hook. I'll tell the good folks out there in voter land I had every right to pork barrel because it was the Year of the Pig."
North Coast Voices has had the luxury of a private viewing of former PM John Howard's diary entries.
JWH said his diary will be heavily used when he appears on the public speaking scene in town and country halls across the country in the New Year. However JWH confided to NCV that he hasn't had any luck in securing the services of an agent who would be prepared to take him under its wing and organise what he is very confident would be a block busting success.
Should he fail to appear on the public speaking scene by Easter, JWH said he would opt for the far more lucrative option of going straight to the big screen and produce and direct a movie about himself.
JWH said he figured a public speaking tour was the very least he should do in order to repay his followers across the breadth of this great nation. In an aside, JWH remarked that he thought the many public appearances he could make would provide him with ideal opportunities to use the blanket appeal strategy and collect any loose coins and folding money his mates had left. "My finances are not what some people say they are. Living off a mere $300,000 pa will be no easy matter. My good wife and I have become accustomed to a life style that we won't be able to throw away lightly. Why else do you reckon I hung in there tooth and nail?"
When asked how 2007 had unfolded for him, JWH exclaimed, "Drats! I thought, sure as eggs, that 2007 was the Chinese Year of the Rat. In fact, I was so sure of myself I would have put good money on it. Not that I'm a gambling man. No sirreee! I'm a Sunday School goer. Mind you, it wouldn't have been my money anyway because, as you all know, I've had my hand in the public purse for so long that I don't even have a wallet I call my own. After all, why would I need one?"
"I've been the nation's prime rodent for over 11 years. Just quietly, some of my best mates reckon I'm the best lying rodent this nation has ever had. And who am I to argue with them?"
When told 2008 was the Year of the Pig, JWH said that made things a whole lot better for him.
"Phew, that's a big help. I'll be able to use that in my speeches. That'll get me off the hook. I'll tell the good folks out there in voter land I had every right to pork barrel because it was the Year of the Pig."
Our very last Howard poll
In a mood of rollicking good humour, a liquid lunchtime discussion turned to canvassing the ideal place for John Howard to spend his retirement. Transylvania and Iraq both got a mention, as did locations close to George Bush or Maggie Thatcher.
The final list is now up in the North Coast Voices sidebar as a poll. Tell us what you think!
Wednesday 28 November 2007
Google Trends begins to chart Howard's exit from world stage
The red line in this graph represents global Google searches for Kevin Rudd and the other represents searches for John Howard.For the first time since Google Trends began, John Howard has lost dominance in these comparative search term trends for Australian political identities.
Google Trends:
http://www.google.com/trends?q=%22john+howard%22%2C+%22kevin++rudd%22&ctab=0&geo=all&date=mtd&sort=0
Monday 26 November 2007
Drop the hanky
It's not so much a matter of simply asking who will be the new head honcho of lurks, perks and jerks in the dishevelled Liberal Party (of course, most of those needy, greedy buggers really require the public funding associated with their positions of public office because they're obviously down to their last bits of folding money), but rather how many of the sore losers now find that being in Opposition is simply too much of a burden.
Naturally enough, "family" now comes first, so rather than occupy the benches to the left of the Speaker, there'll be a rush to the exit doors because all of a sudden Family First is the flavour of the day.
How strange! Their altruism with respect to the public interest and the concept of the 'common good' was only applicable when they were in office.
Real democracy demands the government of the day is challenged by an opposition that is capable of being a genuinely viable alternative. The Lib AND Nat MPs who'll decamp as quick as a wink will say it all. Their commitment was self-centred.
Now, for something totally radical ... could all members of the Coalition who have no intentions of going the full distance to the next federal election on the Opposition benches please raise their hands right now.
Let's set one day aside in the New Year for all the by-elections. That'll assist the AEC - it can conduct all the fill-in-the-spots on one day. The savings in advertising and administrative costs will fund a new hospital.
Unfortunately, April Fools Day doesn't fall on a Saturday in 2008.
Naturally enough, "family" now comes first, so rather than occupy the benches to the left of the Speaker, there'll be a rush to the exit doors because all of a sudden Family First is the flavour of the day.
How strange! Their altruism with respect to the public interest and the concept of the 'common good' was only applicable when they were in office.
Real democracy demands the government of the day is challenged by an opposition that is capable of being a genuinely viable alternative. The Lib AND Nat MPs who'll decamp as quick as a wink will say it all. Their commitment was self-centred.
Now, for something totally radical ... could all members of the Coalition who have no intentions of going the full distance to the next federal election on the Opposition benches please raise their hands right now.
Let's set one day aside in the New Year for all the by-elections. That'll assist the AEC - it can conduct all the fill-in-the-spots on one day. The savings in advertising and administrative costs will fund a new hospital.
Unfortunately, April Fools Day doesn't fall on a Saturday in 2008.
Friday 23 November 2007
Uncle Johnny wants you!
The country needs John Winston Howard. He told you so at the beginning of this election campaign when he realised that all was not well with the polls.John Howard needs you. He told you so after the polls failed to bounce and he began to despair.
The real question is - do you really need John Howard?
Come tomorrow, will Australia get the government it deserves or will it get Howard & Costello. It's up to you.
Thursday 22 November 2007
How I see the day I quit or John-in-Wonderland
These days John Howard's view of his world is a wonder to behold.
Howard in The Sydney Morning Herald on Tuesday.
"Mr Howard yesterday said Treasurer Peter Costello would replace him unopposed as Liberal leader when he steps down, even though the choice is ultimately up to the party room.
The prime minister today defended that statement and offered a candid insight into what would happen on that fateful day.
"I will go into the party meeting and say I hereby resign as leader of the Liberal Party, and everybody will sort of say 'right o', they'll know it's coming, then I'll sit down and say 'does anybody want to nominate'," Mr Howard told reporters.
"In our party you nominate by standing and people will stand and in my view nobody else will stand, and he will be elected unopposed."
Who is he kidding? If the Howard Government fails to win re-election this Saturday, John Howard will be lucky to survive his concession speech without multiple bloody knives in the middle of his back. If the Coalition regains government by a severely reduced majority, John Howard will face leadership challengers aplenty before his preferred time to resign.
The Sydney Morning Herald articles:
Tuesday 20 November 2007
Government's hush up with Exclusive Brethren continues
For a mob that doesn't vote, the Exclusive Brethren certainly has a very strong interest in the political scene in Australia and isn't backward when it comes to lobbying the Prime Minister.
The Age (November 19) reports that Prime Minister JohnHoward has exchanged letters five times with the Exclusive Brethren since 2003, but after 14 months of stalling on a simple freedom-of-information request, his office will not release the correspondence until well after election day.
WHY PRIME MINISTER? WHAT IS THERE TO HIDE?
The Prime Minister's office has at long last acknowledged that it has corresponded with the religious sect with which the Prime Minister has had very close contact over many years.
PLEASE, PRIME MINISTER, TELL THE AUSTRALIAN PUBLIC WHAT THE CORRESPONDENCE AND CONTACTS INVOLVE?
Mr Howard was embarrassed in August when The Age revealed he had met Brethren world leader, Bruce Hales, and at least one sect member who is under police investigation over his role in funding pro-Liberal campaign advertisements in the 2004 election.
Greens leader Bob Brown said the Government had once again manipulated the FoI Act to hide information. Mr Brown was told by the Prime Minister's department, in response to his own FoI request in 2005, that "no records of correspondence with persons identifying as representatives of the Exclusive Brethren … were located". The response to The Age reveals that three relevant documents existed.
"I was lied to. That's clear. Straight deception," Senator Brown said. "But I'm used to it with the Government."
SENATOR BROWN, LIKE ALL OTHER AUSTRALIANS, HAS THE RIGHT TO KNOW THE TRUTH ABOUT THIS MATTER.
Read the full report from The Age at:
http://www.theage.com.au/news/federal-election-2007-news/pmbrethren-letters-held-until-after-poll/2007/11/18/1195321608622.html
The Age (November 19) reports that Prime Minister JohnHoward has exchanged letters five times with the Exclusive Brethren since 2003, but after 14 months of stalling on a simple freedom-of-information request, his office will not release the correspondence until well after election day.
WHY PRIME MINISTER? WHAT IS THERE TO HIDE?
The Prime Minister's office has at long last acknowledged that it has corresponded with the religious sect with which the Prime Minister has had very close contact over many years.
PLEASE, PRIME MINISTER, TELL THE AUSTRALIAN PUBLIC WHAT THE CORRESPONDENCE AND CONTACTS INVOLVE?
Mr Howard was embarrassed in August when The Age revealed he had met Brethren world leader, Bruce Hales, and at least one sect member who is under police investigation over his role in funding pro-Liberal campaign advertisements in the 2004 election.
Greens leader Bob Brown said the Government had once again manipulated the FoI Act to hide information. Mr Brown was told by the Prime Minister's department, in response to his own FoI request in 2005, that "no records of correspondence with persons identifying as representatives of the Exclusive Brethren … were located". The response to The Age reveals that three relevant documents existed.
"I was lied to. That's clear. Straight deception," Senator Brown said. "But I'm used to it with the Government."
SENATOR BROWN, LIKE ALL OTHER AUSTRALIANS, HAS THE RIGHT TO KNOW THE TRUTH ABOUT THIS MATTER.
Read the full report from The Age at:
http://www.theage.com.au/news/federal-election-2007-news/pmbrethren-letters-held-until-after-poll/2007/11/18/1195321608622.html
Monday 19 November 2007
Just for fun - a Daily Telegraph readers poll on Howard's election chances
The Daily Telegraph online readers poll which began on Sunday now has 4,964 votes in at 4.47pm. today.
QUESTION: Is John Howard wily enough to still snatch victory?
Yes - he still must have something up his sleeve. 48% (2396 votes)
No - just look at the polls. 51% (2568 votes)
It seems some people are still expecting or fearing that now famous rabbit in the hat.
Bookmakers odds are still shortening in Labor's favour and yet another Liberal, former NSW Parliamentary Leader Peter Debnam, has taken a swipe at John Howard's campaign strategy.
The Daily Telegraph today:
Sunday 18 November 2007
What's a former PM worth?
Brisbane's Courier Mail http://www.news.com.au/couriermail/story/0,23739,22775928-953,00.html
reports that on top of a post-PM package of more than $300,000 a year, John Howard is expected to earn upwards of a million dollars from non-executive positions, international speaking tours and consultancy work.
A few quick calculations done on the back of a beer coaster reveal that during Howard's time at the helm, where he and Janette have lived off the public purse, he must have been able to stash away well in excess of $1.5 million as savings. Hence, he'll head off in to the sunset very well heeled . And, remember, in addition to his pension that is tax-payer- funded he takes with him heaps of other lurks and perks. What a jerk!
reports that on top of a post-PM package of more than $300,000 a year, John Howard is expected to earn upwards of a million dollars from non-executive positions, international speaking tours and consultancy work.
A few quick calculations done on the back of a beer coaster reveal that during Howard's time at the helm, where he and Janette have lived off the public purse, he must have been able to stash away well in excess of $1.5 million as savings. Hence, he'll head off in to the sunset very well heeled . And, remember, in addition to his pension that is tax-payer- funded he takes with him heaps of other lurks and perks. What a jerk!
That's quite a reward for wrecking the future of working families!
Thursday 8 November 2007
JW Howard - aka the practising perfectionist
How's Honest John's form?
When things are AOK he laps up all the glory, but when events are not as he'd prefer he runs for cover.
"Rising interest rates?" asks Honest John.
"Don't blame me or my government," he says.
Better still, according to Honest John, the best way to address economic events that don't go according to plan is to do a "Reg Gasnier" (sorry, Reg, you shouldn't have to have your name associated with this flea, but your side step in Rugby League is legendary) and side step them.
Sounds a bit like avoiding dog droppings on the footpath doesn't it?
To read more about Honest John's efforts, which was "part regret, part explanation, part defence and part attack" go to
http://blogs.abc.net.au/thepollvault/2007/11/the-press-confe.html
When things are AOK he laps up all the glory, but when events are not as he'd prefer he runs for cover.
"Rising interest rates?" asks Honest John.
"Don't blame me or my government," he says.
Better still, according to Honest John, the best way to address economic events that don't go according to plan is to do a "Reg Gasnier" (sorry, Reg, you shouldn't have to have your name associated with this flea, but your side step in Rugby League is legendary) and side step them.
Sounds a bit like avoiding dog droppings on the footpath doesn't it?
To read more about Honest John's efforts, which was "part regret, part explanation, part defence and part attack" go to
http://blogs.abc.net.au/thepollvault/2007/11/the-press-confe.html
Tuesday 23 October 2007
Tuesday 9 October 2007
A genuine Howard hugger
David Barnett, sometime Howard biographer, crying out in Unleashed at abc.net.au:
"The destruction of John Howard's properly earned reputation as one of the greatest prime ministers the country has ever had - perhaps the greatest - is now well underway........
Howard faces more than the prospect of loss of office and perhaps the loss of his seat. He faces oblivion at the hands of Stalinist historians. The prospect - the certainty - is that a process of rewriting history already begun will continue until the great achievements of a great government and a great prime minister will disappear from the record."
Don't you just love the absurdity of this perspective on John Winston Howard?
"The destruction of John Howard's properly earned reputation as one of the greatest prime ministers the country has ever had - perhaps the greatest - is now well underway........
Howard faces more than the prospect of loss of office and perhaps the loss of his seat. He faces oblivion at the hands of Stalinist historians. The prospect - the certainty - is that a process of rewriting history already begun will continue until the great achievements of a great government and a great prime minister will disappear from the record."
Don't you just love the absurdity of this perspective on John Winston Howard?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
