Newspaper nicknames

Readers of newspapers can, at times, be very cruel. For some, all they have to do to get their daily fill is stroll out through the front door and pick the day's copy up off the driveway (if the deliverer has been on target), out of the rose bushes or (and I swear this is true) if the deliverer has it really in for you, off the roof.

Column8 in today's Herald provides further samples of homework it set its readers. The task was simple enough. All that was required of readers was to tell the Herald (aka Granny) the nickname they gave their newspapers. Previously, The Courier-Mail was said to be the 'Curious Snail', The Cairns Post is the Cairns Ghost (it's thin and wispy at times), The West Australian is the Wet Alsatian and the SMH is The Sydenham Awning Herald ("it works better said than read".

Today, the Western Advocate is the Western Abdicate, The Canberra Times is The Crimes and our own local rag, The Daily Examiner, is 'the one minute's silence' (that's how long it takes to read it).

 

Our neighbours are somewhat kinder, they call it the 'Egg Timer' but Elsie, who lives up the street, calls it 'The Daily Exterminator'. At our place it's referred to as 'The Rapper' - most mornings it takes longer to get the plastic wrap off it than it does to read it, but that's nothing to whinge about. In fact, that task can be quite a challenge and test the grey matter a lot more than a Rubic Cube.

Note to DEX editor and staff: don't get your knickers in knots over those comments. DEX is just like our pet greyhound - you're 'family' and we still luvs ya, warts and all.

Julie Bishops other life?

One for the Only On The Internetz  file…..

An Oz pollie who’s still going strong at 97 years of age. How do you do it, Julie?

"Julie Bishop mini bio:Julie Bishop wos born on 30 Aug 1914in Denver, Colorado, USA.Jacqueline Brown is 5' 3'' (1.60 metres) height.Now actors age is 97 years.Worked like: Actress, Soundtrack.Julie Bishop has appeared in more than 91 films.First work was: 1923 - Bluebeard's Eighth Wife and last was: 1957 - The Big Land."
Seems someone out there in cyberspace got Julie Death Stare Bishop confused with a deceased American actor.

Lismore protestors redecorate Christian Democrat anti-gay marriage truck

StarOnline on 18^th March 2012:

“Lismore’s gay and lesbian community has grounded a truck displaying signage with anti-gay messages which warn of the dangers of same-sex marriage to children.

Locals staged a protest throughout the night and this morning, blockading the truck by parking another vehicle in front it while around 10 – 15 protesters sat behind it to demand the signage be taken down.

Overnight, slogans featuring the words ‘equal love’ and ‘love not hate’ were graffitied over the truck’s signage and the vehicle was covered with coloured streamers and glitter.

A local demonstrator, who requested not to be named, said the protest was not formally planned but was a, “groundswell community response.”

“There were a lot of families there who were distressed and offended by the message,” she told the Star Observer.

“This truck has been travelling the state and no-one is doing anything about it.”

Pics from @ABCNorthCoast

Paddy's fly in the ointment - a postscript to his one big day in the year

The main agenda item at the Table of Knowledge at the local watering hole on Saturday afternoon was traffic congestion in the Lower Clarence area.

Paddy started proceedings by asking, "Where's the worst traffic spot in the Lower River area?"

Bazza replied, "Fair go, Paddy, what do you mean by 'worst'?"

"Ok, I'm referring to congestion, near misses, places you really dread, that sort of stuff."

There was a pregnant pause and then it started!

Without dissent, the intersection of Yamba Road and Treelands Drive in Yamba was given the nod, with quite a few of the lads really going to town about that part of the world and venting their spleens well and truly.

After the ambient temperature fell and normal blood pressure levels returned, Paddy chuffed, "Well fellas, I'm going to tell you something you're not going to like.

"I've been told by a very reliable source (everyone at the table knows Paddy's source is his neighbour Tom, who thinks he knows everything about everything) the Council has no intentions of putting a roundabout in there before 2015 and even then there's no iron-clad guarantee it'll ever get built.

The remarks that flowed after that announcement are not fit for publication.

Paddy continued, "My source has it on very good authority a roundabout at that intersection is on the list of things to think about at council's meeting on Tuesday, but sure as eggs they'll vote along the lines of let's do nothing until 2015 and then we'll have another think about it."

Paddy then sought and was granted an early leave pass. He was taking his good wife out for dinner for his birthday. Thoughtful bloke our Paddy is.

The session wound up shortly after Paddy's departure with all and sundry heading off to their respective abodes, However, Charlie (also known as 'The Prince') had one final shot across the bow.

"Oi, lads, I reckon Paddy's pulling our legs. You all know what today the 17th, is, don't you."

The Cansdell Saga: surely even O'Farrell wouldn't be so stupid?

One paragraph in a letter to the editor in The Daily Examiner on 14 March 2011 certainly raised a few eyebrows in the Clarence electorate:

The other opinion [allegedly that of an unnamed party stalwart ] might be even funnier – Premier Barry O’Farrell is about to announce Steve Cansdell’s appointment as a parliamentary or ministerial adviser.

For all those rabid rednecks baying to the moon about Laura Norder in NSW

A little reminder to the lock 'em up and throw away the key mob fronting the bar at the Bowlo most weeks:

The effect of arrest and imprisonment on crime
Release date: Tuesday, 13 March 2012 Embargo: 10.30am

Increasing the risk of arrest and the probability of imprisonment are much more effective in preventing property and violent crime than increasing the length of prison terms, according to a new study of the effectiveness of the criminal justice system in controlling crime, released today by the NSW Bureau of Crime Statistics and Research. The study is one of the most comprehensive ever carried out in Australia into the effectiveness of the criminal justice system in controlling crime. It examined the effect of changes in the probability of arrest, the probability of imprisonment and the length of the average prison term on trends in property and violent crime across every Local Government Area (LGA) in NSW between 1996 and 2008. Special measures were taken to control for other factors that influence crime, such as household income and drug use. The study also controlled for the effect of crime on the criminal justice system. The Bureau found that a 10 per cent increase in the risk of arrest in the long run produces a 1.35 per cent reduction in property crime, while a 10 per cent increase in the imprisonment risk produces a 1.15 per cent reduction in property crime. Similarly, in the long run, a 10 per cent increase in the risk of arrest for violent crime produces a 2.97 per cent reduction in violent crime, while a 10 per cent increase in the risk of imprisonment produces a 1.7 per cent reduction in violent crime. Although increasing the risk of arrest appears to exert a stronger effect on property and violent crime than increasing the risk of imprisonment, the differences were not found to be statistically significant. Arrest and imprisonment, however, were found to exert significantly stronger effects on violent crime than on property crime. A 10 per cent increase in the risk of arrest in the long run produces a 2.97 per cent reduction in violent crime, compared with a fall of only 1.35 per cent reduction in property crime. Similarly, a 10 per cent increase in the imprisonment risk reduces violent crime by 1.7 per cent compared with a 1.2 per cent reduction in property crime. The stronger effect for violent crime may be at least partly due to the higher risk of arrest for violent crime relative to property crime. The 30 day clear-up rate for non-domestic assault, for example, is 21.7 per cent, compared with 3.7 per cent for burglary. Interestingly, the study found that household income exerted a much stronger effect on crime than the criminal justice system. A 10 per cent increase in household income was estimated to produce an 18.9 per cent reduction in property crime over the long term and a 14.6 per cent reduction in violent crime. The effect of income on property crime is more than 14 times larger than the effect of arrest, while its effect on violent crime is nearly five times larger. Commenting on the findings, the Director of the Bureau, Dr Don Weatherburn, said that they were very reassuring given that Australia currently spends more than $11.5 billion annually on law and order. In per capita terms, this amounts to $511.00 per person per annum. “At the same time, it is important to bear in mind that the study did not examine the cost-effectiveness of current policy in controlling crime.” “Overseas research suggests that it is possible in some circumstances to cut crime and spend less doing it than we currently spend locking people up. The NSW Drug Court is a good example.” Further enquiries: Dr Don Weatherburn, 9231-9190

The study

Maintenance in NSW public schools - it's a lottery

The new kid on the block in Macquarie Street, Chris Gulaptis (Member for Clarence), has been refreshingly honest (well, partly) in a piece that gives readers a distinct impression that he, rather than a staffer, prepared for a column "Chris Gulapris - Clarence MP" in this week's Coastal Views.

Gulaptis wrote about the government allocating $40m to its Public School Upgrade Fund.

BIG PROBLEM - Gulaptis didn't let on the time frame the $40m has to cover. In terms of what's needed to fully fund maintenance problems in NSW public school, $40m is just a drop in the bucket.

Now, to the "win-lose"scenario. Gulaptis said Casino High School "won "$70,000 to fix its roof.

Gulaptis's statement begs two questions:
1. What would have happened if Casino High School hadn't been so lucky with its lottery ticket?
2. What does the Local Member suggests other, not so lucky, schools do about their maintenance problems?