Centrelink Call Centre Blues: a true story

During a North Coast flood event a person I know rang Centrelink to see if he could fax his fortnightly Newstart form to the Grafton office instead of submitting it in person since he was cut-off by flood waters.

The conversation went like this:

Centrelink Call Centre: Sorry sir, you must present yourself to the nearest Centrelink office.

Newstart Recipient: I can’t get to Grafton because the roads are flooded.

Centrelink Call Centre: I will pull up the map of your area…………......
Sir we’re in luck. The nearest Centrelink office is in Yamba, you may hand your form in there.

Newstart Recipient: Does your map show a blue line between Iluka and Yamba?

Centrelink Call Centre: Yes sir.

Newstart Recipient: That line is called the Clarence River and it is in flood.

Centrelink Call Centre: Can’t you get a ferry or boat to go across the river?

Newstart Recipient: The ferry is closed because of all the trees and dead cows, not to mention flood water, coming down the river.

Centrelink Call Centre: Well sir, you will just have to go to the next suburb and catch the train.

Newstart Recipient: Iluka does not have a next suburb unless you count Woombah and to get there I have to cross another river called the Esk and it is in flood as well. The road is closed.

Centrelink Call Centre: Just go to your local train station.

Newstart Recipient: The nearest train station is in Grafton and to get there I would have to cross the Clarence River twice and travel along roads that are closed because of the flood.

Centrelink Call Centre: Please hold the line, sir. I will get my supervisor.

Then the above conversation was repeated.

The result of this was that the person was finally given permission to fax their form into the Grafton office – which then promptly recorded a breach of compliance and stopped the dole payments.